Sunday, 11 August 2013
What to do with my "Mummy Head"?
I went to my Mums yesterday with Malc and the boys. We mowed her front and back lawns and trimmed wild bushes back to neatness. We ended up staying all day. We tracked Edens flight which the boys thought was amazing. I received an email last night from the mum of the family she's gone with.I've also joined Facebook for the 10 days she's away. I haven't got a clue what I'm doing, I can't find anything or anyone. I really don't understand it but it means that Eden can message me and we can see what adventures she's having so it's got to be worth it. Clark stayed at my Mums last night so we only had three children here which felt really weird. Unfortunately there was a party in the road round the corner from us with loud music and a fight broke out which spilled into our road so that kept us up until the early hours. Then I woke at 3-30 am and checked my emails to see if Eden had been in touch. She had, so Malc and I had a cup of tea and looked at them and replied. Cody also woke so he was looking at them with us. We went back to sleep and woke again at 9am. I've been fine, there have been a couple of times I've had to hold back tear but this morning one of Edens favorite bands, Imagine Dragon's came on singing one of their songs that I'm so use to hearing Eden sing and it was all to much. I indulged in a few tears sitting on my bed! She just seems so far away! I know she's safe and happy, I've had pictures of her playing a guitar on their front porch already but my "mummy head" is going to take a right bashing over the next couple of weeks I think. I feel such a fool as well, other mums seem to let their kids go anywhere and they don't seem to worry, don't want texts or contact but I find that strange. I feel like I can't talk to friends, they seem to think I'm over protective and worrying too much. I feel quite lonely and isolated with my thoughts and emotions at the moment. Hopefully tomorrow is another day and each day will get easier. Sorry to ramble and indulge in self pity, I just don't seem to have anywhere else to release my feelings